For now

Just angry words in my mind. Guess they dont deserve to be posted.
Soon I should be back.

Just reflecting

This country has surely given me lots of memories.

What my own country couldn't do in years this place did in months. As a results of it, I am occupied with these lately- lactocalamine, pain killer, anti viral tablets...

But other than that it gave me freedom without time, strangers without a heart...guess I shouldn't crib. But heck I'm not allowed to scratch so I have to do something else!

Well I'm getting better and this is all going in the 'experiences' section of my life.

It's hard to imagine some things but then when you see them with your own eyes, life becomes a little less mysterious.

I would have never imagined myself with spots. Infact I never thought I would get chicken pox as I had my share of such things as a kid. And now here I am.

My life has certainly undergone a transformation. I have done things I didn't think I would do, enjoyed some and hated others.

Yet all of it has made life less of a mystery to me. I understand its dynamics and balance and how things work in the real world.

And in all this you need time to reflect and that's what I am doing right now.

Surprise surprise...

Now there might be some changes in the direction in which this blog was going.

A certain spot showed up and well now some others did too. So we will just have to talk sbout them.

I'm talking about chicken pox.for anyone who reads this post, I hope you have had it.

I noticed the first one on my beloved country's republic day. Wasn't too sure what it was but I knew it was an alien. Then the doc and the revelation,ah... now I'm here, writing.

So I get a forced vacation and some time to do things that I need to. That's just one of the ups.

My appetite has become better, if that was possible. Thus it's possible I put on a bit by the time people see me next and may not believe the chicken pox 'story'.

But this here is the first post and we shall see what else can spring from this situation I have found myself in.

Oh yeah though this may sound unimportant if possible keep an account of who has had chicken pox in the family, especially little kids.

Well now I need my rest. Shall be back soon.

Me, Chocolate, Fuck

I had 3 ideas in my head about what I wanted to write today. But not feeling well was threatening their presence on the blog.Then I thought I shouldn’t let all that thinking go waste.

So here I give you the 3 ideas quite briefly in one post.

First- 'Fuck' is not such a blasphemous word. My teachers use it here ever so often and judging by that it is acceptable if used in the right circumstance.

Like when you lose a story you just wrote or when the world seems too bad and you say 'fuck it' to survive. I must admit it has helped me out of many a tough spots.

(You probably know this but I'm easing my guilt at using it more often lately).

Second- There's isn’t much that a good helping of chocolate cannot solve. When today I didn’t feel too good I put some chocolate spread on bread and ate it and I felt much better instantly.

(But I must remind you that the emphasis is on the quantity of chocolate).

Third- by some weird twist I have completely forgotten the third thing I was going to say. I tried to recall it but zilch came back.

Ah fuck it! I'll eat some chocolate...

Sunny side up!

We here have to learn to live without the sun because it just doesn’t feel like showing up. Today however it has pierced through all the clouds and showed up.

Now the joy of sunshine on your face in the winters is an experience shared by humanity. Usually when I’m alone and enjoying the sun I feel free of all the cares and the burdens. They fade away in the shining glory of the sun.

The warmth of the sun is so reassuring and seems to set everything right. There is clarity in my head and joy in my heart. It’s quite a good feeling, really.

But today I didn’t feel that same measure of the intoxication.

All I wanted to this when I came to this lovely city was to lose myself somewhere in the beautiful places and bitter sweet life away from home. I wanted to make a fresh beginning and do things differently.

My expectations were not met, they still are somewhere at the back of my mind waiting for redemption.

Now I realise that as beautiful as the day looks and as lovely as life seems on the bright and happy days, you have to keep the goodness flowing through the rest of the days.

But its hard work and you have to make it happen. That’s the only way. Sun or no sun, life has to be made good.

Though I admit it’s just easier on sunny days.

Sweet passions

I have been gorging on a carrot cake for the past two days. And the thought of having the last bit tomorrow makes me want tomorrow night to come quickly.

This is the land of desserts. There are just too many of them- waiting for you to dig into them. They melt in your mouth and leave you in sweet heaven. And you cannot wait to have them again.

Just like the temptation for sweets sometimes takes over, revisiting moments from the past just happens. Times that have been so very special, find their way into my conversation.

After my share of roughing it out there the temptation to revisit a happier past takes over. I recall the times gone by to fill emptiness of some days. And maybe my eyes light up as my heart is fed with their eternal sweetness.Then my heart is glad and my soul content.

But I do remember to leave some of the good bits for another day.

I don’t know if being a girl makes a difference but such things just don’t leave you too easy. The memory of a friend, seeing each other grow out from fears, realising how long we have known each other...guess everyone has had such moments.

And so I move on. Maybe to other desserts hopefully.

Designs on me?

In my life of long days and hungry evenings and even nights (at times) there is a certain encroachment by CSS( cascading style sheets).

I’m doing an online course and here comes the fun part... or so I hear. Rip apart a website.......see what it’s like on the inside. 3 columns, bold, picture here, white space...well actually suck the fun out of looking at an awesome website by thinking of how it was made and oh yeah...why.

Then design new pages of a website you would proudly call yours. Well I thought I’ll take it bit by bit (I mean the ripping!).

But there does come a time when the familiar sense of ‘ahem... why am I doing this’ steps in. Psst...It’s for the money, honey!

‘Speed’ as they say is of the essence. The life of a journalist is not easy folks. There are stories to be written and more to be edited and well it has to be done on the go. Think on the go, eat on the go.
Just go go go...

And I’m not really going anywhere with this ramble. But I’m just preparing myself for more invasion by style guides and tags and fonts and colours.

So if you see lesser posts than you’re used to...just know that I’m around but working..

Behind my back

Living alone is a pain. If carrying grocery and getting shoulders busted twice a week was not enough, then it’s doing the laundry.

Doing the laundry in the halls here....well my first time around. The laundry bag got heavy and walking all the way to the launderette. Lord! My arms broke. My back had not yet recovered from lifting a heavy suitcase when this came along.

But the ordeal didn’t end there coz I had to take the stuff back all the way.

Add some rain and some cold wind and hair flying all over the place to the picture and doing all this on a growling stomach and you just about get the juicy part of my day.

Oh and I had a little tiff with a tiny annoying woman (I was tempted to get her by the neck and she’d regret it!)

Living alone is quite an experience and that’s what I'll say for the moment. All these years, I have hated carrying weight but all alone now and these weighty issues seem to crop up so often.

By the end of this year here I’ll definitely have grown stronger. But the moment I can’t take it anymore, I’m telling mom I want to get married.

I need someone to carry the weight around (including me)!
:p

OMG

OMG the date displayed on the previous post is wrong! It says 13th Jan but it should be 20th.

"Blogger malfunctioning...beware beware!"

Been around...

My holiday's over. I'm back to classes now. The effects of the vacation can be seen....no its not a tan but the extra inches I have around me.

But I love the fact that the jeans are tighter (way to go mom!)and that I may look a little healthier.

I have been around for a while but didn't find time to blog. Thoughts have made it to the drafts of the blog but not beyond and just lay there.

Good that one of my new year resolutions was not updating the blog regularly or I'd have broken that one right away. But hopefully all that should change now.

Guess I need some more dedication, inspiration, perseverance and......ah I'll be regular.

But here are some lines from earlier this year that did not make it:

Chocolate and ice cream giving me company
New Year and Christmas are history

Back to work for me
No late mornings for this busy bee

I’ve already labelled my mountains
And here again it begins

Roll up those sleeves and tie the wild mane
It’s an uphill ride, it ain’t no game

New Year fever

When the party is over
And the alcohol doesn’t burn
When all the eves are gone
And the winter is colder

What will you do?

When faith overflows
And doubt leaves without a trace
When the dark cannot smite
And the day doesn’t bite

What will you do?

When you’re in the middle
And you’re no saint and you're no rogue
When bad feels as good as bad
And the highs come down like fever

What will you do?
***
The first week of the New Year is over. From adrenalin highs to normalcy...