In the now

Sometimes you just have to believe
there is no other way.
Nobody can prepare you for life
or can they?
What is wrong and what is right
at this point I cannot say.
How do I do this
what is living my life my way?
Who stands in judgement
besides me and my?
Was I happy then
or am I happy now?

Jean-e-tically

My life is a pair of jeans
The more fun I have
The tighter it seems

I could do with a new one
But there is no time
And no place to run

I wanted to get it right
But realised long back
There is no perfect fit

A little crinkled,a little faded
It stands in its shades
Life gets a bit jaded

Just reflecting

This country has surely given me lots of memories.

What my own country couldn't do in years this place did in months. As a results of it, I am occupied with these lately- lactocalamine, pain killer, anti viral tablets...

But other than that it gave me freedom without time, strangers without a heart...guess I shouldn't crib. But heck I'm not allowed to scratch so I have to do something else!

Well I'm getting better and this is all going in the 'experiences' section of my life.

It's hard to imagine some things but then when you see them with your own eyes, life becomes a little less mysterious.

I would have never imagined myself with spots. Infact I never thought I would get chicken pox as I had my share of such things as a kid. And now here I am.

My life has certainly undergone a transformation. I have done things I didn't think I would do, enjoyed some and hated others.

Yet all of it has made life less of a mystery to me. I understand its dynamics and balance and how things work in the real world.

And in all this you need time to reflect and that's what I am doing right now.

Sunny side up!

We here have to learn to live without the sun because it just doesn’t feel like showing up. Today however it has pierced through all the clouds and showed up.

Now the joy of sunshine on your face in the winters is an experience shared by humanity. Usually when I’m alone and enjoying the sun I feel free of all the cares and the burdens. They fade away in the shining glory of the sun.

The warmth of the sun is so reassuring and seems to set everything right. There is clarity in my head and joy in my heart. It’s quite a good feeling, really.

But today I didn’t feel that same measure of the intoxication.

All I wanted to this when I came to this lovely city was to lose myself somewhere in the beautiful places and bitter sweet life away from home. I wanted to make a fresh beginning and do things differently.

My expectations were not met, they still are somewhere at the back of my mind waiting for redemption.

Now I realise that as beautiful as the day looks and as lovely as life seems on the bright and happy days, you have to keep the goodness flowing through the rest of the days.

But its hard work and you have to make it happen. That’s the only way. Sun or no sun, life has to be made good.

Though I admit it’s just easier on sunny days.

Designs on me?

In my life of long days and hungry evenings and even nights (at times) there is a certain encroachment by CSS( cascading style sheets).

I’m doing an online course and here comes the fun part... or so I hear. Rip apart a website.......see what it’s like on the inside. 3 columns, bold, picture here, white space...well actually suck the fun out of looking at an awesome website by thinking of how it was made and oh yeah...why.

Then design new pages of a website you would proudly call yours. Well I thought I’ll take it bit by bit (I mean the ripping!).

But there does come a time when the familiar sense of ‘ahem... why am I doing this’ steps in. Psst...It’s for the money, honey!

‘Speed’ as they say is of the essence. The life of a journalist is not easy folks. There are stories to be written and more to be edited and well it has to be done on the go. Think on the go, eat on the go.
Just go go go...

And I’m not really going anywhere with this ramble. But I’m just preparing myself for more invasion by style guides and tags and fonts and colours.

So if you see lesser posts than you’re used to...just know that I’m around but working..

When

When
There was an internal strife
I needed to get a life

life
Was I being punished for obeying?
For which horror was I paying?

couldn’t
There must be a goal, I had none
There was no battle I won

suck
No hope, no sunshine, and no words I could rhyme
How could I fight the tears I hadn’t cried?

anymore, it did!
My brain was playing tricks
I could throw up, I was so sick

But then... I had a moment
From moments of desperation
Came some bit of inspiration

My feet were firm on the ground again
If I tried, maybe I could make life sane

Now I believe in me once more...